Land of the Free Speech? The Raciscm Card

For a country that prides itself on free speech we sure do censor one another. What is the old rule. No politics or religion at the dinner table. There are other ways of effecectively shutting people up and my least favorite is the "race card".

With all the renewed iterest in politics and elections over the last few months I was brave enough to view a few websites and post a comment here and there that were, hopefully, thought provoking. I am new to this "post your comments for the world to see". It takes some courage to be honest and open in the hopes of legitimate dialogue. I applaud anyone who spends the time and effort to honestly communicate with their fellow man.

In this case I got slapped in the face for my efforts. I wrote a comment about my doubts in voting for a man who, before this current election, I new very little about. That was it, nothing more but a few doubts were mentioned. But, because this man is African American, and because one reader out there didn't like my comments, he called me a racist.

What do you do with that? Nothing! It pretty much shuts you up is what it does. It effectively censors the thoughts and ideas of the person accussed because now there is a suspicion of doubt.

And as much as I loathe being unfairly labeled I am angry for a whole other reason. Racism exists and people will forever suffer the consequences of this injustice, but when we carelessly and without close knowledge of a situation "cry racism" it is similar to the famous fable. When someone truly needs to use the call for help or point to a racial injustice, the cry has lost a little more of it's meaning and power because of missuse.

Women Who Never Leave High School

High school was not my favorite time in life. I was never one of those kids who floated through high school on a cloud of popularity. Actually, I consider myself a pseudo high school expert. You see I attended three different high schools as a student, and taught at three more. Through this I have observed all types of kids and cliques and insecurities involved at this age, but what truly amazes me is observing these same characteristics in the forty-something-stay-at-home moms.

You may or may not have encountered these creatures. The are found in middle-to-upper-middle class neighborhoods. Their husbands make enough money that they don't have to work, and are gone often enough that the wives have nothing to focus on except the kids and themselves. They never really forgot their power and prestige in high school, and the ways and means they used to acquire them. Mostly by their looks and willingness to sell their values and individuality, they clawed their way to the top of the social circles and know that they can rely on the same "talents" to do the same in adulthood. You can identify these mothers by the full-make-up and warm-up suites they wear for drop-off at school in the am.

My first encounter with these women through me for a loop. On first meeting them, and even several meetings afterwards they appearto be normal, caring women. Asking about you and your children, they pay rapt attention to you and give all the signs of wanting to get better acquainted. It isn't until one of the telling questions are asked that they identify themselves as being other than normal. What is this question you ask? Well, it really belongs to a set of questions that can be categorized as the "What socio-economic bracket can I place you?" group.

I usually pass the first couple of questions. After all, our entire community is known in the greater metro area as being a bit, how shall I put this, nose in the airish? So, you really have to get down to the nitty gritty of things to find out if someone is worthy of friendship. I usual fail the, "Where do you live?" question. There are million dollar home communities and half million dollar home communities and my residence falls in the later.

It is quickly apparent that I have fallen in the not-worthy-of-pursuing category as soon as I answer this question. Even if we have been conversing for a good twenty minutes of so, the person will pause and look about the room for a distraction. Anything that they can use as an excuse to move on to another potential social conquest. This has happened to me dozens of times. I have all the right social graces, am reasonable attractive (and thin, you have to be thin) have passed the education requirement, and even pass the suitably-connected-at-school test, but still fail the where you live question every time.

About the Debates

If any of you watched the third and final debate last night, I am sure it was obvious to all who is more camera worthy. Obama is a younger, smoother, more polished presenter than McCain. It was, shall we say, glaringly obvious who does tv better. The media's split screen format really played up the comparision, at least, cosmetically of the two candidates. I don't remember ever having a split screen view of the candidates in the past. I kept thinking, "It really pays to be photogenic in the race for the Presidency."

I was watchig tv tonight just for the pure pleasure. I deserved it. I payed my dues to the democratic process last night. The funny thing was, I was still watching the debate, only now I was watching parodies of it. I couldn't escape the media's portrayal of the two candidates' last battle.

Obama was again, a smooth presenter, playing up to a comedicly doddering McCain. I saw this on several news/entertainment shows. You know the ones. If you were unaware and slightly stupid you might actually mistake them for "real" news programs. And that's my problem with the media running these parodies. That and the fact that if you are one of two Americans about to be elected to the highest office of the land, should you really be subjected to being portrayed by a second-rate news guy in a bad rug? A little respect please.

I don't care who you vote for this election year. It is your right to vote your conscience. Vote for who you think will be the best for you, your family, and the American people these next four years. But please don't vote for the best looking, most photogenic, guy around. Trust me. You get what you vote for.

Neighbors Noisy Grown Offspring

I know some folks have a lot more to complain about than noisy neighbors, but you would be surprised how stressful being woken-up every weekend can be. We live in a great neighborhood, with old and young neighbors alike. This is the root of the problem.

We all live by different schedules and some of my not so teenage neighbors children keep very late weekend hours. For various reasons these post-high-school kids are staying at home but treating their house more like a dorm than a residential area. Every Friday and Saturday night we are awoken by one or more of these neighbors talking to their departing friends in the street at 4 am or reving their overly loud cars to impress onlookers.

I could see these kids being completely oblivious to sleeping neigbors but what about their parents? They are home and I can't imagine they think either myself or my small children are up at that hour. I don't have a choice to sleep in on weekends. There are small mouths to feed in the morning regardless of when the kids next door party ended.

I guess I will just chalk this up to the general disregard for others that is plagueing most Americans these days. Are other countries experiencing a general epidemic of rudeness?

About this Bailout

Why is every one of our politicians side-stepping the issue of who's to blame for this 700 billion dollar bail-out. They ask, "What good will that do us now?" That is equivalent to a teenager, after having his/hers parents come home to discover a trashed house with several hundred drunk classmates of their offspring roaming about, asking, "Mom and Dad, what's the point of placing blame and punishing me now? Let's just work together to get my friends out and clean up the house together." Now, as good parents, will they say, "That sounds reasonable", and completely forego punishing their child. Or will they punish them, in the hopes some sort of moral lesson might be learned. If not in the hopes of making their child a better person, perhaps just to save their house the wear and tear. I don't know. But, I think for my estimated 6 to 10 thousand dollar portion of this bail-out, I would like some answers. My guess is that the politicians don't want their major campaign contributors to be either in jail or short on cash come next election season.

Mothers and Daughters

When I was about twelve years old, I became aware of the fact that it might be important to be seen as pretty. I know it seems a little late to become aware of this. I mena, let’s face it. This is America, land of the eternally youthful and skinny. But, I was pretty much a tom-boy growing up and was slow on the uptake on everything girlie.

So, it was on this day, as my mother drug me along shopping that I asked her, “Am I pretty?” Now, most mothers that I know would automatically reply, “Yes”, because they love their daughters and actually think they are pretty, if not to the world in general, than to those who know them. Not my mother. No my mother stopped, took a gook look at me, and says, “Well….”.

Now, at this point I tuned out the rest of what she had to say. I was too busy cataloguing the two truths about my mother that I had just learned.
1) My mother would never lie to me just to save my feelings.
And
2) I was never going to be able to count on her for encouragement beyond what she thought I was realistically capable of.

Both of which remain true today.